The day has finally come that I fancy a jock. As someone who spent most of their teenage years avoiding alpha males (indie boys were my obsession) and stereotyping her school’s rugby team (harmless meatheads at best, predatory misogynists at worse), I didn’t exactly see this coming. And yet, that has all changed because of one man: Travis Kelce. Or, shall we say, Mr Taylor Swift.
In case you defied science and somehow missed the news that has dominated this week’s online discourse, Kelce and Swift are engaged. The announcement came by way of a ludicrously over the top photoshoot shared on Instagram that looked like it had been staged in the garden of Eden. Lush greenery, bursting blooms in every crevice, Kelce smiling in a cable-knit polo shirt, and Swift in a striped dress with a staggeringly large diamond on her finger. Both of them wore Ralph Lauren.
'Your English teacher and your gym teacher are getting married,' read the caption on the joint post that has since garnered more than 34.2 million likes. But proficient PE instructor or not, Swift’s American footballer husband-to-be is clearly so much more than a typical jock. This was apparent early on in their courtship, which began in 2023 after Kelce, an already fairly devoted Swiftie, attended the Eras Tour show in Kansas City, Missouri.
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Speaking on his New Heights podcast, Kelce revealed he’d made Swift a friendship bracelet with his phone number on it, with the intention of giving it to her at the show. A clip of Kelce’s revelation went viral online, and Swift’s team took note. Soon after, rumours began percolating that the pair were dating.
Joining her now-fiance on an episode of New Heights released earlier this month, Swift said their meeting was akin to Kelce 'standing outside of [her] apartment, holding a boom box saying, 'I want to go on a date with you''. It was a romantic gesture straight out of Swift’s playbook, as she said herself: 'This is what I've been writing songs about wanting to happen to me since I was a teenager.'
This is a man who is not afraid to speak openly about his feelings. Nor is he threatened by the archaic rules of traditional masculinity he’d potentially be breaking by being vulnerable online, admitting to making something as girl-coded as a friendship bracelet, and even being a Swift fan in the first place – I can’t tell you how many men I’ve sat across from on dates whose faces have fallen when I’ve told them she’s one of my favourite artists.
And that’s just the beginning. Throughout their relationship, it has been abundantly clear that Kelce is a man who leans into his female partner’s success rather than shying away from it. Where Swift’s exes (ahem Joe Alwyn) have seemingly preferred to keep away from the limelight, something you’d imagine is a significant struggle when you’re dating one of the most famous women in the world, Kelce celebrates it ardently. Not only does he regularly praise her commitment to her craft, talking about her in serious terms (often referring to her as an 'artist' and an 'athlete'), but he also made a surprise appearance on stage during one of her Eras tour performances in London last year.
Despite being a wildy successful and popular athlete in his own right, Kelce clearly enjoys being in whatever subsdiary role the public might’ve cast him into. 'I get to be the plus one,' the 35-year-old told GQ. 'I get to go and be that fan. Because I am a fan. I’m a fan of music. I’m a fan of art. And it’s so cool that I get to experience her being that plus one for me on the football field… I feel that same enjoyment every time she comes to my shows.' This kind of unbridled enthusiasm for being with a woman whose public and professional success far outshines that of her male partner shouldn’t be refreshing but it is.
I’ve seen the reverse at play several times in my own relationships, as well as those of my friends. I’m talking about men who earn slightly less, or are still finding their professional feet, who’ve only ever felt emasculated by their female partners for daring to do well. What starts out as tacit resentment – a condescending remark here, a disparaging comparison there – inevitably develops into an emotional battlefield where one person’s success is consistently pitted against the other’s. Achievements aren’t so much as chamioned as they are weaponised. It’s a grim place to be, one that almost always ends in tears – and breakups that should’ve happened far sooner.
This is not the case between Kelce and Swift, who, it seems, is just as much of a supportive partner: 'I sort of made her a football fan,' Kelce told GQ. 'She is the most engulfed fan now. She knows what the injury reports look like. She understands what special situations are, third and short – all these things because she just naturally loves to hear about my job.'
On top of this, there’s the way Kelce is perpetually praising everything about Swift, from her commitment to fans, the way she handles public scrutiny, and her intelligence; as Swift used terms like 'esoteric' and 'effervescence' on the New Heights episode, Travis remarked, 'She’s so hot when she says big words.' Exchanges such as these become a lot more charming when you consider this is man who once famously misspelt 'squirrel'.
The irony is that Kelce couldn’t be more of an alpha male, at least not objectively. He’s one of the most successful athletes in the US, and is subsequently in mint physical condition. He co-hosts a podcast with a largely male audience. And at 6’5, he towers over Swift as if some sort of bear-like figure protecting Goldilocks. But evidently, Kelce joyfully subverts all of the hackneyed tropes you’d typically associate with any of this. Because at his core, this is a modern, sensitive man who seems utterly delighted to have fallen in love with one of the most successful women on the planet. Frankly, I’m thrilled for them both – and only a tiny bit envious.
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